El Pasoans Fat, Inactive and Diabetic
The results are in, and good news, El Paso; we’re not one of the Fattest City in America. But we're still pretty fluffy, though.
According to Wallethub's 2019 Fattest Cities in America list, El Pasoans have collectively gone from last year’s plus-sized #33 ranking to this year’s more-to-love #29 spot.
The study also concluded diabetes lurks around every corner around here.
Per the financial website's voodoo science, El Paso has the highest percentage of diabetic adults in the country. As you may have heard, diabetes is no bueno. Complications include heart disease, blindness, and the inability to fit into a Mini Cooper.
But wait, there's more. The data also determined El Pasoans are not doing enough squats. In fact, we’re doing diddly squat. According to the study, El Paso has some of the highest percentage of residents who are "physically inactive," which is just a nice way of saying we're a city full of fat, lazy people.
Good to know I’m not the only one who can no longer tell where my butt ends and the couch begins. But in my defense, Netflix ain't gonna watch itself. Now, where’s the remote?