5 Things You Don’t Want To Talk About At Thanksgiving Dinner
Thanksgiving is the best and worst holiday out there. It's the best because, turkey, and it's the worst because there is nothing else to do but eat. No presents or carol singing to distract you and pass the time. Nope. Just eating and sitting. If you don't want things to get real uncomfortable real fast, don't talk about anything on this list:
5. Grandkids - There is nothing worse than being surrounded by family members bugging you about when you're going to finally have a baby. If the subject comes up, offer to do the dishes. Don't scoff. It's better than hearing about your biological clock.
4. Wine - Or any kind of alcohol, especially the amount of alcohol you're drinking. You might put away a couple of bottles of wine with your friends on Friday night, but don't do it at Thanksgiving. You'll never hear the end of it, and you might find a self-help book in your Christmas stocking.
3. Your job - When your aunt starts talking about your cousin who just made partner in a big New York law firm asks how you're doing at work, tell her with a smile on your face that you just learned how to work the french fry machine, so things are looking up. It'll make your aunt feel superior, and she'll leave you alone out of pity.
2. Your love life - It might work out in movies when someone persuades their gay friend to pretend like they're the heroine's boyfriend, but in real life, it will probably end up with your friend falling in love with your cousin and having to hear the story of how you tried to pass him off as your man being told at every Thanksgiving for the rest of your life. Go alone, but keep checking your phone like you're getting sweet and sexy text messages from your boyfriend who had to go out of town to his hometown. No one needs to know you're really surfing Buzzfeed.
1. Politics - For the obvious reason. Your mom spent a lot of time cooking the turkey, peeling potatoes, and baking pies - it's better to eat the food rather than watch it getting flung back and forth in a food fight between the Clinton and Trump factions in your family. Come to think of it, if you talk about politics, then you can drink more wine and watch the show. Politics, definitely talk about politics.