SURI CRUISE TELLS OFF PAPARAZZI - GETS CALLED A BITCH: Being the spawn of TOM CRUISE and KATIE HOLMES, seven year-old SURI CRUISE has spent her entire life being hounded by the paparazzi. And so it's not surprise that yesterday, as she and her mom were trying to get past them and into their car in New York, she lost her cool and started yelling at them to "Stop it!" and "Get out of the way!"

What was a surprise was how one of those morons actually yelled back, quote, "Bye, Suri, you little brat!" When another photographer told the guy who said it that it wasn't cool, he responded by calling Suri the other B-word.

LEAH REMINI QUITES SCIENTOLOGY OVER ALLEGED 'THOUGHT MODIFICATION': Former 'King of Queens' star LEAH REMINI'S bad Scientology experience wasn't just over "thought modification." According to the New York Post, she threatened to call police about the apparent disappearance of the wife of church leader David Miscavige. Shelly Miscavige hasn't been seen in public since 2006, except to attend the funeral of her father in 2007.

Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images

The Post says the downward spiral began at Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes's wedding. Leah innocently asked where the church leader's wife was, and was sternly told, "You don’t have the [bleeping] rank to ask about Shelly.” That led to her allegedly getting hauled in for interrogation, with questions such as, "‘Why are you asking, who are you connected to, are you going on the Internet?"

When that interrogation got Leah wondering and considering whether the police should be involved, the church engaged in "Security Checking" which basically involved turning her life and lives of her family members and close friends upside down in an effort to make sure they wouldn't expose its secrets. A source says that after five years of this sort of treatment, Leah finally said, "Enough" and quit the church.

SPLITSVILLE - POPULATION 'THE MAN OF STEEL': Wait, what?! HENRY CAVILL and KALEY CUOCO have already broken up? We just found out they were a couple last week, but apparently The Big Bang Theory's 'Penny' and the new movie Superman are no longer a couple. A source confirmed the split to E! News but didn't know or didn't want to tell them why they broke up, or how long they actually dated.

SNAPSHOTS: RUSSELL BRAND walking around in baggy pants and something pretty impressive going on down there. (PHOTO) -- LADY GAGA looked pretty impressive herself walking around New York City yesterday in a skirt, bra and heels. (PHOTO) (PHOTO)

BIEBER BIZ: A couple of days ago TMZ reported that SELENA GOMEZ had taken JUSTIN BEIBER back on the condition that he stop acting like such a douche. Well, it didn't him long to break that promise.


We get word today that Justin and his punk ass hanger-ons were kicked out of a Chicago nightclub the other night by police who showed up after being tipped off that Bieb and company were being served drinks. The club was cited for serving minors, Justin was merely booted out because, well, the rules don't apply to him.

Here's the picture the nightclub tweeted out of Justin's time there. See how many douchey things you spot happening in the photo. I'll start: sunglasses at night, indoors. Now you!


ANOTHER BAD BABY NAME: Add BUSY PHILLIPS to the list of celeb parents giving their kids terrible names. Phillips and her husband decided to name their newborn Cricket Pearl. Cricket, who was born last week, joins big sister Birdie Leigh in the family. Yep, Cricket and Birdi. Insert sad trombone sound effect here.  

COVER SHOT - AMANDA SEYFRIED SAYS LISTEN TO YOUR VA JAY JAY: Ladies, you've been approaching dating the wrong way. When you're wondering if you should let a certain fella pursue you, don't listen to that little voice in your head -- pay attention to something a little farther south.

That's what AMANDA SEYFRIED does. Amanda, who stars as Linda Lovelace in a new bio-pic about the porn star, tells Elle magazine an immediate sexual attraction is a must, and if your vag doesn't love him at first sight, it probably never will. "Everybody I've dated I've been sexually attracted to immediately. Sparks don't grow -- your vagina doesn't become more inclined to wanting someone just because you're around them." Truer words have never been spoken.