WTW??? IS THERE REALLY AN ADELE SEX TAPE OUT THERE???!!!: Could it be? Is there really a sex tape out there featuring ADELE? Some French magazine claims there is!And they claim it's going to hit the Internet soon. The cover of the magazine even has an alleged screen cap from the tape ...

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The magazine claims to have acquired the tape from Adele’s ex, who offered it up for several thousand euros, as revenge for all the songs Adele has recorded about him. According to my trusty French to English web translator, here's what's on the tape: " The pictures show the singer against the back wall seat of her car, and it looks to get a foothold for the trifle ...Horrifying pictures were taken with a smart phone, which are only focused on the face and the privacy of the star. "

Okay, maybe something was lost in the translation.

RIHANNA, CHRIS BROWN - REUNITED FOR REAL:RIHANNA threw a birthday party for herself at a private home in Los Angeles this past Monday, and sources say CHRIS BROWN was in attendance. In fact, TMZ claims he and Rihanna, quote, "spent a huge chunk of the night nuzzling up against" each other.

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If this is true, are you cool with it? I mean, it's been three years, and he's doing everything the courts told him to do to make up for it, and she’s obviously forgiven the guy. Discuss.

The site adds that Chris was so worried about the news going public he tried to get everyone at the party to sign confidentiality agreements. That could explain why pictures of Chris at the party haven't surfaced, but we did find a shot of the birthday cake.  That's supposed to be Rihanna straddling a huge blunt, by the way. Girl likes her the wacky tobaccy, you know.

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Chris Brown and Rihanna are back together musically as well. Breezy has hopped on the official remix to his pop-star ex-girlfriend's new single "Birthday Cake," and will also be featured in the video. He has recorded both a rap verse and a singing verse, but whether both will be used is still up in the air.

IN DENIAL - CHRIS BROWN: US Weekly reported yesterday that Chris tried to pick up a woman during Grammy week allegedly using the line "Can I get your number? I promise I won't beat you."

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According to the woman, Brown rolled up on her at the Lasio Professional Hair Care suite and used that line on her. Adds the woman, "He and his friends laughed, then one yelled, 'That's his new line.'" Hey, at least he didn't say something like "Rihanna? Yeah, I hit 'dat."

Brown vehemently denied he ever made such a comment, telling TMZ, "That is absurd and absolutely not true. I did not say that nor would I joke about that."

WHITNEY HOUSTON FUNERAL: WHITNEY HOUSTON'S funeral tomorrow will be a star-studded affair. And for the record, BOBBY BROWN will be in attendance.

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We're told ARETHA FRANKLIN and STEVIE WONDER will sing at the service. CLIVE DAVIS -- who discovered Whitney -- will speak, as well as Whitney's "Bodyguard" co-star KEVIN COSTNER. I believe this will mark the first time since "The Bodyguard", Costner will have a speaking part in something people will actually watch.

As we’ve previously reported, the funeral is being streamed on the Associated Press' Livestream page starting at 10 A.M. our time.

WHITNEY HOUSTON FAILED HER PRE-FACELIFT MED EXAM:WHITNEY HOUSTON reportedly failed a routine medical check two weeks before she was found dead in a hotel bathtub. Radar Online reports that Houston wanted a face lift because "she was concerned about her appearance," but Dr. Marc Mani, a board certified plastic surgeon, refused to perform the procedure on Houston after she didn't pass the medical clearance exam that tests a patients heart, lungs and liver. Mani refused to confirm or deny whether Houston had attended his clinic, citing federal medical privacy laws.

RELATIONSHIP REPORT - JADA PINKETT'S VALENTINE'S DAY MESSAGE TO WILL SMITH: Maybe WILL SMITH and JADA PINKETT aren't breaking up after all. Jada recently recorded a love song called "Burn" and posted it on her Facebook page on Valentine's Day, dedicating it to Will. Lyrics include, "Can you feel my heartbeat next to yours? / Stay here within me, never leave me / I want to burn." You can listen to it and download it HERE

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Along with the audio, she wrote a message to Will that concluded with, quote, "Will, I love you. Happy Valentine's Day. This is for you."

BABY POOP:JASON BATEMAN and wife Amanda welcomed their second daughter, Maple Sylvie Bateman, last Friday. They're just now getting around to sharing the news with us, cuz, well, they were probably kind of busy what with a newborn and all.

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SPLITSVILLE: MARCIA GAY HARDEN has filed for divorce after 15 years of marriage. Since she wants us to "respect her privacy" that's all we know.

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ON THIS DAY IN TABLOID HISTORY: It was five years ago today that BRITNEY SPEARS famously shaved her head. That was one cray-cray chapter in her life, huh?

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