Your Tide Pods Are Safe – Bogus Tweet Says They Were Going To Be Discontinued
For some reason, people like to do things that will potentially kill them. They like to jump out of planes and trust that whomever packed their chute knew what they were doing. They like to drive cars at mach speed on I-10 and weave in and out of traffic like they are possessed by Paul Walker. And, for some completely unknown reason, they like to eat plastic pods full of laundry detergent that can cause massive gastrointestinal distress or even major respiratory distress.
In other words, eating a dang Tide Pod can make you really, really sick, and it could be fatal to little kids. Like they could die. So stop eating the damned things and use them for your clothes.
Having said that, I love Tide Pods. I don't eat them, I wash my clothes with them. That picture above is of my very own Tide Pod container at home. I keep it out of reach of small children and stupid teens and adults who might think they look like candy and want to eat them. So, imagine my surprise when I saw a tweet circulating online that Tide had decided to discontinue their Pods because people are fools:
Well, after a bit of interwebs investigation, I discovered that Tide did not tweet that they were going to discontinue the Pods of Clothes Washing Magic, it turns out that someone mocked up the tweet. Tide did put out this tweet. The only good thing here is, Tide Pods aren't being discontinued. The only bad thing here is, people seem to still be eating them. Stop eating them. That can't be said enough. And thank you, Tide, for not discontinuing the Pods.