BRITNEY B.S: 1.) Yesterday, Radar Online posted an audio clip of an alleged conversation between BRITNEY SPEARS and her first husband, Jason Alexander, during which she says her boyfriend, Jason Trawick, quote, "beat on me."

(--Britney and Jason Alexander got hitched in Vegas in '04. The marriage was annulled 55 hours later. Jason Trawick is the one pictured below.) In the clip, Alexander is heard saying, "I thought [Jason Trawick] proposed to you or something at the beach." To which the voice that may or may not be Britney replies, "Before or after he beat on me?"

2.) Brit's rep denies the report and insists the female voice on the tape doesn't belong to his client. Manager Larry Rudolph tells Access Hollywood, "Lawyers are amassing. We are 100 percent taking stern and immediate legal action."

Jason Alexander isn't backing off his story. Quote, "I completely stand behind my story . . . that is absolutely my ex-wife Britney Spears on that tape."
He tells the "Star" tabloid that Britney has been reaching out to him, and that Britney is in ,quote, "an abusive relationship. She told me her life had turned into a nightmare." And not that it means anything outside the "Maury Povich Show", but the "Star" also claims Alexander passed a lie-detector test.

Meanwhile, a statement on Britney's website claims she's had no contact with Alexander in YEARS, and that the recording is, quote, "so obviously fake as to be laughable."

WE REPORT, YOU DECIDE: Here's "Purported Britney" telling ex-husband Jason Alexander that her boyfriend, Jason Trawick, has been physically abusive toward her …

In this clip, "Alleged Britney" talks about why she didn’t press charges …

Here's something to compare the "Fake Britney" audio with. It's a clip of "Real Britney" from 2008 wishing her fans a merry Christmas …

COVER SHOT: It's official! JAKE GYLLENHAAL and TAYLOR SWIFT are in love!! Because tabloid headlines don't lie ...

JESSICA SIMPSON vs PINK!!! WHO YOU GOT???: It's ON between JESSICA SIMPSON and singer PINK. Jess is reportedly furious because she didn’t appreciate the way Pink trashed JOHN MAYER in the British press, and trashed *her* in the process.

Here’s what pink said: “He (Mayer) only dates stupid women." According to Pink, “I got into an argument with him, and that’s what he told me. He said ‘I only [shag] really stupid women’. So I said ‘Well, I guess they’d have to be stupid to be with you.’

Jessica’s livid that Pink would publicly suggest she was stupid. So, was Pink dissing Jess? Says Pink, “I was defending her. That’s the way Mayer talks about all his women."

THE EVA LONGORIA CHEATING SCANDAL: Even though they're in the middle of a divorce, EVA LONGORIA and TONY PARKER were spotted having lunch yesterday with some other friends in Santa Monica.

According to a witness, "Eva and Tony were acting really lovey-dovey with each other. She was stroking his head with her hand. They did not look like a couple that has just filed for divorce."

But a "source" close to the situation says we shouldn't expect a reconciliation . . . "They remain friends and everything is amicable. Eva is a class act. That's how gracious she is."

IN OTHER SEPERATED COUPLES DOING LUNCH NEWS: COURTENEY COX and DAVID ARQUETTE had lunch together yesterday as well. They arrived and left separately, but witnesses say Courteney gave David a kiss on the cheek when she got there.

EX SAYS HE HAS VIDEO OF J. LO EXPOSING HERSELF IN PUBLIC: An agent for Ojani Noa - who was married to JENNIFER LOPEZ for 11 months in the late '90s - says his client has found old videotapes of J. Lo exposing herself on the streets of Cuba.
The agent tells RadarOnline the new 'American Idol' judge is seen in the video "riding a scooter in public in Cuba, while talking to the camera and numerous bystanders, with her privates in as plain view as Paris Hilton, Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan have in the past."

(--Noa tried to use old footage of their relationship in a movie last year, but Jennifer sued and a judge blocked him from doing so.)

REALITY SHOW BYTES: 1.) KATE GOSSELIN says contrary to 'People' magazine reports,her kids' school didn't expel theme. No. Instead,they "did not feel like they could meet(her children's) needs" and "decided they should leave."

Okaaaay. Isn't her explanation kind of like saying, "You can't fire me, I quit"? Man, why couldn't she move this smoothly on the dance floor?

2.) JENNIFER GREY'S mirror-ball trophy came at a price - a ruptured disk in her lower back. She's set to undergo surgery in the next few days.

3.) TYRA BANKS crowned Chelsey Hersley the winner on last night's season finale of 'America's Next Top Model'. Now can someone get her a sammich ...