Cocaine Cigarettes Might be Coming, El Paso Smokers

Juarez drug cartels better start worrying about Marlboro as scientists have created tobacco leaves that produce cocaine.

Scientists these days are always breaking bad.

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Just look at Walter White, he was a chemistry teacher.

But now, they've hit the Holy Grail of cocaine production.

Scientists have discovered how to grow tobacco plants with leaves that, aside from nicotine, produce cocaine.

According to them, "The molecular origami each is responsible for not only fills in crucial steps on how cocaine arises out of a convoluted chemical production line but reinforces the relationship between two pharmacologically significant plant compounds."

Man, finally people can have their cake AND smoke it too!

"To demonstrate this, they plugged six cocaine-production genes into the tobacco plant, Nicotiana benthamiana, leaving the genetic hybrid to fill in the gaps using its own versions of the suspected enzymes."

No more needing multiple dealers now the 7-Eleven cashier is your dealer.

If tobacco always had this property America would have been colonized much sooner. And faster. You know... the cocaine.

The second the Native Americans showed the pilgrims the cocaine-tobacco John Smith would have said, "Okay, everything you own is ours now!"

But, through clenched teeth.

Also, what are we supposed to call this pharmaceutical Frankenstein?

Toba-caine? Co-cac-o?

All I know is that the Mexican drug cartels better start watching their backs because Marlboro is coming for them.