I just wanted to remind you to be ready for the Rapture. Sadly, there's a chance you won’t get to dress up like a skanky something-or-another for Halloween -- at least, if you put faith in end of the world prognosticator Harold Camping, who rescheduled his previously missed doomsday for today, Friday, Oct. 21.

Yeah, I know, I hate that I had to work an entire week, only to have the world end before I can go out for a few drinks too. But what are you gonna do? Just make sure you have plenty of water, canned food, and Pop Tarts. You might also want to repent before going to work or school, you know, just in case.