3 Places Future-Former El Paso D.A. Yvonne Rosales Could Be Hiding
The embattled future-former district attorney of El Paso, Texas, Yvonne Rosales hasn't been seen by anyone for quite some time, and I have some theories.
Even when summoned to her own removal proceedings in front of a judge, defunct and incompetent district attorney Yvonne Rosales failed to make an appearance on Monday, November 28th.
Even defense attorneys who have cases with the district attorney have been unable to reach her citing over 15 unanswered subpoenas.
And her tenure started off so well. Here she is discussing her first 100 days in office:
And here she is today:
So when your head's this far in the ground, I have some ideas about where terrible district attorney Yvonne Rosales may be hiding out these days.
1. Hair Salon
I'm not the type of person who enjoys making ad hominem attacks or even has the right to make fun of someone's hair:
but, Yvonne Rosales's hair is a whole other story.
That thing looks like it has a life of its own.
A mixture of a bouffant and a beauty pageant updo, this kind of hair requires meticulous upkeep and maintenance.
If I was Yvonne Rosales and I was hiding from the courts and the public that elected me, I'd probably be at a salon 24/7.
2. D.A.A. - District Attorney's Anonymous
Everyone knows that being the district attorney of a city is a difficult job.
You are required to prosecute the citizens you live with. You're forced to go out in public and actually talk to people.
And the stress of all this can lead to certain kinds of problems.
That's why there is District Attorneys Anonymous or D.A.A. where overworked and stressed out district attorneys can anonymously get together and discuss why they're not doing their jobs.
3. Sunland Park Mall
If there's one place in El Paso where nobody will look to find a district attorney gone rogue, Sunland Park Mall is the place to be forgotten.
With a food court that nobody eats at, and with stores that are in reality a gym or volleyball court, malls have become so 20 and late that I doubt anybody would find miss Rosales there.
In all seriousness, a dually elected Texas State official and representative of the people of El Paso, even Rosales has an obligation and duty to face the public.
The fact that she's scurried down some rat hole somewhere, to avoid any and all scrutiny by the public and people who voted for her is just sad.
If anyone has any sightings of the elusive creature known as district attorney Yvonne Rosales please let us know and take some pictures.
Let me know what you think at firstname.lastname@example.org
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