Not only does shrubbery purify the air and add a touch of nature, but these plants also make for great conversation starters.

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As a single dude living in the Texas heat of the Southwest, I've found that having some indoor plants are a great way to bring life and color into my personal space, or as I like to call it: the Banger Zone.

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But for people born without a green thumb, plants can be difficult to maintain in this weather; and by maintain, I mean to keep alive, and by alive I mean not flakey and feeble, hanging over its pot, slaked with thirst, and covered in the dour dew of death.

So! If you're looking for indoor plants that thrive in the arid climate of Texas, New Mexico, or Arizona, here are your 10 best options:


1. Snake Plant:

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They are extremely resilient and can tolerate low light and infrequent watering, making them ideal for people who are forgetful or have a busy, slithery, schedule.

If you ever bring them onto a plane you should say, "I'm sick and tired of these m************ snake plants, on this m************ plane..." Just because you can.


2. ZZ Plant:

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Another low-maintenance option that can endure low light and drought conditions.

Also, insert ZZ top joke here.

They have glossy, waxy leaves and can grow quite tall.

... Unlike ZZ top...


3. Ponytail Palm Plant:

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Despite its name, the triple pee (PPP) is actually a succulent and not a genuine palm tree.

Like Lindsay Lohan, it has thin, long leaves that cascade down, resembling a ponytail, and can survive with minimal watering, but not Vodka.


4. Aloe Vera Plant:

Photo by pisauikan on Unsplash
Photo by pisauikan on Unsplash
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Known for its healing properties, Aloe Vera makes for an excellent indoor plant. It thrives in bright, indirect light and requires little water.

I keep this just as a natural Hispanic first aid kit.


5. Spider Plant:

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With their long, slender leaves that resemble spider legs, Spider plants are easy to care for and can tolerate low light and infrequent watering. Arachnophobes need not worry.


6. Philodendron Plant:

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There are wide different varieties of Philodendrons, but all of them have large, glossy leaves that make a statement in any room.

They prefer bright, indirect light and moderate watering.


7. Pothos Plant:

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Pothos are ideal for hanging baskets and have heart-shaped leaves that come in various colors. Remember the musketeers?

They can endure low light and infrequent watering.


8. Haworthia Plant:

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Haworthias are small succulents that come in various shapes and sizes.

Unlike most Whorthias I know, THESE thrive in bright, indirect light and can survive with minimal water, OR vodka.


9. Christmas Cactus Plant:

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Despite its name, the Christmas cactus can bloom at any time of year.

Making tiny ornaments that the leaves can support is optional... But preferred.

It also prefers bright, indirect light and moderate watering.


10. Jade Plant:

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Jade plants have thick, fleshy leaves and can grow quite large over time. They prefer bright, indirect light and moderate watering.

All of these plants are excellent options for adding some greenery to your pad, while also flourishing in the Southwest's hot and dusty climate.

Whether you're a dude with no game, an avid plant enthusiast, or simply seeking to spruce up your spanking space, these indoor plants are certain to impress the rest.

Let me know what you think at nico@klaq.com

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