Texas Monthly says we don't have good barbeque here in El Paso. Some writer said he went to eight BBQ joints and wrote, and I quote, "BBQ in Far West Texas? I’ll Paso".

I see what you did there! So clever! I'll Paso. Woo! Comedy gold.

Clearly this guy didn't check out Mo'z in the northeast, Smokey's on Viscount, Tony's in downtown El Paso, or State Line on the westside. Ok, he did check out State Line, but because it is part of a chain and not local, he didn't really count them as being 'El Paso'.

I've been going to Tony's since I was a little kid because my dad's office was right down the street. They have brisket sandwiches that people line up out the door for. Mo'z is amazing BBQ with a southern flair. His ribs are some of the best in town. Smokey's is a mainstay on Viscount, and their brisket and baby back ribs are the stuff of dreams. Is this east Texas BBQ? No, it's West Texas BBQ, and let me tell you, we know how to cook a tasty pig.

Here's the thing about BBQ. As with all food, what is good to you might not be good to me. For God's sake, Austinites, who do great BBQ, eat migas. Migas are a mess on a plate of soggy corn tortillas scrambled with eggs. Mike told me that in South Texas, where he comes from, 'migas' means 'vomit'. If you've ever seen migas, you know he's right.

And don't even get me started on the Tex-Mex abomination the rest of Texas likes to eat. I ordered enchiladas in a Dallas restaurant a couple of years ago and they had drowned them in chili beans! When I told her real enchiladas don't involve chili beans, she said, 'You're not from around here, are ya?" No, I'm not, and thank God!

The best thing about El Paso barbeque is it's from El Paso, and not the eastern part of the state where Tex-Mex is considered edible and reporters think they're being clever when they say 'I'll Paso.'

Now, get out of my way - I'm gonna eat me some ribs!

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