Warning — The Nintendo Switch’s New Games Taste TERRIBLE
We've all been there -- no one else is around, you're bored, so you shove video games in your mouth.
Okay, so maybe that hasn't happened to you, specifically, but it does occasionally happen to toddlers and really young children. I mean, cripes dude, babies will shove everything short of dog poop into their face holes.
So as video game giant Nintendo prepares to release its new console -- The Switch -- this week, word has leaked that their video games taste terrible. On purpose. The reason? The games come on tiny SD cartridges that any child or pet could easily try to swallow. Until, of course, they actually taste it.
Well, OF COURSE everyone was going to try them. Saying something tastes terrible is like stabbing it with a flashing neon sign that reads "I GO IN YO' MOUTH, SUCKA!"
Verge gave us the inside scoop on what the taste is actually like. Not that it matters. As soon as you get one, you're gonna toss it in your mouth like a LifeSaver -- don't lie:
“It tastes like insecticide,” he told the staff in Slack. “It is literally the worst thing.” To compare, I licked an iPod Nano, a Logitech Harmony remote, a Fitbit, and an LG Watch Sport. I can confirm that all those gadgets are inoffensive to the palate, ranging from plasticky to metallic depending on the materials. Later, Bohn added, “It won’t go away. I don’t want to do this again.” -- Verge, "Yes, Nintendo Switch cartridges taste terrible"
So, there you go. Nintendo games go in Nintendos, not on your tongue.
But even though the cartridges taste awful, you don't really have to worry if a kid actually puts one in his or her mouth. Nintendo told Verge:
To avoid the possibility of accidental ingestion, keep the game card away from young children. A bittering agent (Denatonium Benzoate) has also been applied to the game card. This bittering agent is non-toxic.
The team at Polygon took it one step further:
Intrepid reporter Julia Alexander tried tasting cartridges from the Nintendo DS, Nintendo 3DS and PlayStation Vita. None of them had any particular taste. (We should note that we were unable to try cartridges that were fresh out of the box for these older platforms.) -- Polygon, "Nintendo Switch game cartridges taste offensively bad, trust us"
The internet, ladies and gentlemen. Putting horrible things in our mouths just to see if what everyone else says is true since 1995!