REAL (WO)MAN OF GENIUS ... When Sara King of Manatee County, Florida (pictured, left) reported to prison to start serving a 30-day sentence for drug possession last week the deputy searching her asked her a standard question: Do you have anything on you you're not supposed to have?

This is where every inmate says "No", either because they AREN'T trying to smuggle something in, or because they're lieing. But not Sara, because Sara evidently wasn't paying attention during Smuggling 101 class. She told the deputy ... and I quote ... "Just my pills in my vagina."

Despite her honesty, Sara was hit with a felony charge of introducing contraband into a correctional facility. Oh, and the drug she was smuggling in? A drug used to cure drug addiction. Gotta love this country!

NO TOILET – NO BRIDE ... Forget all the unrest in the Middle East, the country of India is trying to bring their own social change to the countryside. Young women there are joining the government’s No Toilet – No Bride’campaign and are refusing to get married until their future husbands install a toilet in their home. (--In rural India, millions still go outside to take care of business.) Evidently their traditions are a little different than ours. There it's 'something old, something new, something borrowed, and something that flushes'

NO GOGGLES ... A school in England has banned goggles from being used in swim class. The school officials reasoned a student might accidentally snap the goggles on their face too hard, possibly damaging their eyes. So no swimmer will be allowed to wear swim goggles. In a way it’s kind of nice to see a total lack of common sense isn’t just an American problem.

MORE PROOF THE CRACK DON'T SMOKE ITSELF ... When Mila Birkestrand of Fort Walton Beach, Florida was pulled over for speeding late Sunday night one of the cops told her he was a bit suspicious because she was in an area that's known for drug deals.

And without any prompting, because she was eager to prove her innocence, she told them to go ahead and search her car for the drugs. They took her up on the offer and naturally, found drugs in the car.

A crack rock on the driver's side floorboard, to be exact. Despite her explanation that she hadn't BOUGHT the crack, a man gave it to her in exchange for a ride, Mila was arrested.