The Stupid News: Pirates Hold Hostage Sale & Facebook Foils Thief
HOSTAGES ON SALE ... Somali pirates were reducing ransom demands over the weekend. Yeah, you see, they’ve captured too many ships and have too many hostages, so they were reducing the ransom on some of the captives to turn them over faster.
Like a huge Pirate BOGO weekend sale, I'm thinking. They're getting so desperate in some cases, they're even throwing in free OnStar and satellite radio.
MAN PROPOSES WITH STOLEN RING. BUSTED WHEN FIANCEE POSTS PIC ON FACEBOOK ...21-year-old Robert Driscoll of Trafford, Pennsylvania wanted to propose to his girlfriend, Crystal Yamnitsky, but he didn't have any money. So Robert opted for the five finger discount. While they were at a party at a friend's house, Robert STOLE that friend's engagement ring, and then gave it to Crystal.
She - being a woman and all - immediately took a photo of it and posted it on Facebook with the caption, "Look what Robby gave me. I love him so much." But, ya know, when you post pictures of things you stole on Facbeook, other people see them.
One of Crystal's Facebook friends was her cousin and he saw the photo and recognized the ring. He then told the friend who threw the party, who then called the police who in turn paid Crystal's a visit. She told them Robert was out getting the ring resized, but he'd actually taken it to a pawn shop and sold it for $250. (--It was a three-carat diamond ring that was ACTUALLY valued $12,000)
Rob was arrested for stealing the ring, and Crystal - who it turns out knew it was stolen - was arrested for conspiracy and receiving stolen property.