Stupid News: The “Horndog High” Scandal & Police Have Six Hour Standoff with Unconscious Man

DOH!... When Jonothan Ray Gonsalez of Box Elder, Montana was pulled over during a routine traffic stop last week he knew full well he had three outstanding warrants for drug charges, which is why when the po-po asked for his name, Jonothan lied, and gave the police the name of an acquaintance: Timothy Michael Koop Junior.

The problem with that genius plan, however, was that Jonothan didn't realize Timothy ALSO had outstanding warrants. When they ran Timothy's name, the warrant came up, and Jonothan was arrested. Police eventually figured out Jonothan's real identity, and now, on top of his drug charges, he's also looking at a charge of issuing a false report.

NEW HAMSHIRE POLICE HAVE SIX HOUR STANDOFF WITH UNCONSCIOUS MAN ... Police in Ossipee, New Hampshire looking for an armed robbery suspect were called to a home he was believed to be inside of.

After calling for him to come out repeatedly and not getting an answer, they called in the SWAT team. A SIX-HOUR STANDOFF ensued before the SWAT team finally busted into the house ... and figured out why the suspect hadn't responded to them; He was PASSED OUT COLD from a DRUG OVERDOSE. He's going to survive the O.D and face armed robbery charges.

HORNDOG HIGH ... Two female high school teachers in Brooklyn, New York - 30 year old Alini Brito and 34 year old Cindy Mauro - have been fired after being caught by a janitor rolling around a classroom floor half naked while their students were at a school assembly.
This despite their insistence to the school board that it was all a misunderstanding. They weren’t having sex ... Brito, you see, is diabetic and invited Mauro to help test her blood-sugar levels and give her a shot of insulin. With her pants down and shirt off. Isn't that how everyone does it?