I’ve watched enough crime shows to know the bad guy always makes at least one stupid mistake that leads to him or her getting caught. Evidently, though, a 42 year-old British woman isn’t as observant as I am.

Recently, a building cleaning crew in northeast England found Kim Collins bound, beaten, and gagged. She told them a masked man had surprised her in the middle of the night, attacked her, snorted a bag of cocaine, and stolen the safe. But detectives didn’t buy her story as readily as the cleaning crew did.

The more cops investigated, the more holes they found with her whole masked men scenario. Kim finally admitted not only had she made the whole thing up, she’d come up with her genius plan after watching various episodes of "CSI". Turns out her boyfriend owned the building, and she wanted him to get rid of it so they could move.

She figured the “attack” would scare him into selling it. It didn’t work out that way, of course, or it wouldn’t be "Stupid News." Kim was arrested and charged with "wasting police time."