Mike’s the Stupid News – Woman Refuses Sobriety Test, Claims Breasts Too Big

A Florida woman who was pulled over on suspicion of driving while intoxicated told officers she couldn’t perform a field sobriety test because her breasts were too big. 

49-year-old Maureen Raymond was pulled over in Port St. Lucie, Florida after police saw her speeding and weaving across the center line. After they smelled alcohol on her and found an empty glass that did too, Raymond was asked to perform a sobriety test where she balanced on one foot. According to the police report, she said the officer, quote, “needed to understand that she is big-chested”, which would make balancing difficult. The officer asked again if she could perform the test and Maureen reportedly replied, quote, “Hell no not with these . . . big boobies.”

She instead began to dance and take her clothes off, saying she wanted to show the officers just how big her breasts were. That’s when Raymond was arrested. (And from her claims, I bet it was their biggest bust of the night!)

Here’s Maureen’s mug shot. Unfortunately, it only shows her from the neck up. The police report did not specify her breast size, nor did it offer a ballpark estimate so we don’t know if she has a case.