A Massachusetts man was arrested after trying to have his way with a victim who couldn't say a word to stop him ... because she was made of cardboard! Charlie J. Price, a registered sex offender, walked into a Pittsfield pharmacy, approached the sunglass display and, according to the Pittsfield Police report, “hugged it tightly and then began to lick and kiss the face of the female party on the display.”

Onlookers described the 57-year-old as "intoxicated" -- an assessment that was confirmed when he fell down about a minute into his inappropriate public display of affection and began shouting at other customers. Price pled guilty to a single count of disturbing the peace and was ordered to pay a $200 fine.

Sadly, a gazillion iPhones and Blackberries out there, and no thought to take a picture or shoot some quick video. I mean, really, a drunken dumb*** starts having his way with a cardboard cut out and not one pic???!!! I’m disappointed.