Hey babe, I didn't come home last night because a group of guys kidnapped me. And they had knives. And they cut me and beat me up. Call the cops, babe! Help me!

Wait, wait... Did I say I was kidnapped? I meant, I was out with a bunch of co-workers. Female co-workers. Babe! Put that chancla down!

dona ana county sheriff's office

Dona Ana County Sheriff's say 24 year old Angel Figueroa decided he wanted to go partying with a bunch of his female co-workers rather than go home back on May 22nd, so he cooked up a story about getting kidnapped by a group of three black men at knifepoint. He even told his girlfriend to call the cops so he could report the incident. So she did.

Sheriff's deputies say that their investigation shows that two women Figueroa worked with, picked him up after work and they went to a bar together. Those women said Figueroa told them he was going to a convenience store to use the phone but never came back to the bar.

Maybe he figured he better cut his night short.

Figueroa told his girlfriend and deputies that the men drove him around for six hours and cut him with the knife they kidnapped him with. Deputies think his injuries may be self-inflicted.

It's probably nothing like what his girlfriend should do to him

Figueroa was arrested on Tuesday for filing a false report, and booked into jail with bail set at $2,500. He posted bail about two hours later.

Wonder if he called his girlfriend for the money.