A comedic icon, Joan Rivers, passed away today at the age of 81. Lucky for us, she left an explanation of what she would want at her funeral. It's as detailed, witty and true to Joan's character as you would expect. 

D Dipasupil/ Getty Images

Joan Rivers released an autobiography back in 2012, where she talked about all of her life experiences, memories and everything good and bad in her life. The book, title "I Hate Everything, Starting With Me," had a section in it where she discussed what she would want if she ever did pass on. And it is just as hilarious as we all expect from this comedic legend.

"When I die (and yes, Melissa, that day will come; and yes, Melissa, everything's in your name), I want my funeral to be a huge showbiz affair with lights, cameras, action…. I want Craft Services, I want paparazzi and I want publicists making a scene!

I want it to be Hollywood all the way. I don't want some rabbi rambling on; I want Meryl Streep crying, in five different accents. I don't want a eulogy; I want Bobby Vinton to pick up my head and sing Mr. Lonely.

I want to look gorgeous, better dead than I do alive. I want to be buried in a Valentino gown and I want Harry Winston to make me a toe tag. And I want a wind machine so that even in the casket my hair is blowing just like Beyoncé's."


Joan, with how loved you are by Hollywood and the public, I think Harry Winston might make an exception for you. Rest In Peace.