LINDSAY LOHAN IN THE CLEAR: LINDSAY LOHAN gets away clean again. It turns out Lohan will not be prosecuted for allegedly stealing hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of watches and sunglasses from a Hollywood Hills home last week.

TMZ says the L.A. County District Attorney rejected the case because they had "no evidence that any jewelry, including watches, was taken." According to the D.A., the home's owner Sam Magid did not identify Linds as a suspect and the "potential eyewitnesses have refused to become involved."

The gossip site says that they have it from a reliable source that this Sam guy sent Linds a text saying, quote, "I officially told Detective Rodriguez you can't take anything from me 'cause what's mine is yours." He also told her that he told the cops the real culprits were men and that he will, quote, "fight for [her]."

IN DENIAL - LINDSAY LOHAN: Lindsay's rep quickly issued a statement saying Linds is "glad this matter has been cleared up," and added, "it is unfortunate that many media outlets were quick to point fingers and jump to conclusions without having all the facts."

"The facts," by the way, are pretty bizarre. Magid told cops Monday that Lindsay claimed the real culprit was a man claiming to be Suge Knight’s son, Andrew Knight. He said he was in touch with Knight and another one of Lindsay’s friends, and that they told him the night of the theft, Lindsay had handed them a bag with a few of the stolen items wrapped in her t-shirt.

Magid also said on Monday he reached out to Lindsay, who claimed she had hidden some of the other stolen items around the house because she was afraid they would be stolen by burglars. She also apparently confessed she was on Ambien at the time, so the details of that night were hazy.

Pretty cray-cray, huh? So even though the charges have been dropped against Lindsay due to lack of evidence, the whole thing kind of makes you wonder, dontchathink?

EVEN MORE LOHAN LUNACY - HOTEL BANS LINDSAY FOR BEING A DEADBEAT DEBTOR: Could it be the reason Lindsay suddenly escaped to New York after being accused of stealing $100,000 in jewelry from a Hollywood Hills home is because she didn't have a place to stay in Los Angeles?

For most of the summer, Lilo had used the Chateau Marmont as her Los Angeles home. But after repeatedly ingnoring requests to pay up, the hotels general manager forced her to move her stuff out and banned her from stepping foot on the property. Lohan supposedly owes more than $46,000.

The itemized bill reveals her lavish lifestyle, over 47 days, while she used the Chateau Marmont as her apartment and personal 7-11:

•Minibar charges: $3,145
•Cigarettes: $686 She smoked 49 packs, which the hotel charged $14 each
•Chateau restaurant: On July 4th, Lindsay and her friends ate $1,992 worth of food
•Lohan spent $686 on room service on that Fourth of July party


BABY POOP: “Jersey Shore” star NICOLE 'SNOOKI' POLIZZI and her newborn baby boy, Lorenzo, were wheeled out of a New Jersey hospital yesterday and headed home with diapers, rattles — and a full TV camera crew in tow. (PHOTO)

Speaking of cameras ... how much, if any, of Lorenzo's birth will make it to television? RadarOnline says the "Snooki & JWoww" production team was in Snooki's hospital room in the moments leading up to the birth, but they were kicked out just before things got a little too real.

However, her fiancé and baby daddy Jionni continued filming on a personal camcorder. Thankfully, though, we hear he limited the visuals to Snooki's face. As for how much of the footage will make it on-air, it's unclear at this time, but it's pretty much guaranteed we're going to see at least some of the footage. Sadly, it won't be until the next season of "Snooki & JWoww," which won't debut until early next year.

2. Us Magazine posted a photo of PINK on break from shooting a music video, wearing lingerie and holding 14-month-old daughter Willow. (PHOTO)

3. MARIAH CAREY hit up her babies website to share a few more photos of Dem Babies -- Monroe and Moroccan -- with us ...

ROMANCE REPORT – ESTRANGED ‘TWILIGHT’ LOVERS AGREE TO MEET UP: Could reconciliation be in the works for ROBERT PATTINSON and KRISTEN STEWART? Don’t look at me, I have no idea. But a source for ‘Look’ magazine claims that at the very least they have agreed to meet up after having spoken on the phone for over an hour.

On their emotional phone call, Stewart allegedly begged Rob to take her back and pleaded with him trust her again. According to the source, Pattinson feels sorry for her and is ready to speak to her face to face about everything that has happened.

Even if K-Stew and R-Patz do meet up, they won’t be doing it at their old place. 'Us Weekly' says Pattinson is selling the L.A. home they once shared. A so-called insider says Rob is dumping the place because it holds "too many memories."

COVERSHOT: CARLY REA JEPSON graces the cover of Canadian Fashion magazine's upcoming October issue ...

ROMANCE REPORT - TAYLOR SWIFT HIRES PRIVATE JET TO PICKUP BOYFRIEND: The relationship between TAYLOR SWIFT and Conor Kennedy has gotten to a point where a week apart is apparently a week too long.

One of those ubiquitous sources told the New York Post's Page Six, “Taylor missed Conor so much, she sent a plane” to pick him up and bring him to Nashville. The source adds, “He’s been with her ever since. Things have become so serious between them so fast that no one in Hyannis Port would be surprised if they eloped.”