SPLITSVILLE - POPULATION EVA LONGORIA: EVA LONGORIA and New York Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez are done, kaput, over, ancient history, um ... well, you get the idea.

Although the news comes after Mark was spotted flirting with other women over the weekend, his rep tells 'Us magazine' it was, quote, "about scheduling more than anything else," before adding the prerequisite "they will remain close friends" statement. Riiiight. A source whom I can only assume by his statement has intimate knowledge of the split adds, "[Mark] likes to go out and have fun. [Eva's] more focused on her career and her philanthropic work." According to the insider, Longoria is currently "very focused on her work for the Obama campaign."

SIMPSON SHOCKER! JESSICA SIMPSON'S DAD IS GAY!: I'm gonna tell you right up front this one comes via the rarely-reliable National Enquirer so it could be true or it could be crap. Either way it's definitely awkward.

Bryan Bedder, Getty Images

The National Enquirer is reporting that JESSICA SIMPSON'S dad has come out to his family. But wait, there's more! And he has a 20-something year-old boyfriend! Okay, now you can do a spit-take.

Supposedly, that's why Joe Simpson's wife, Tina, filed for divorce this past September. According to their insider, “Joe got the family together about two months ago and came out of the closet. He told them that he’d tried to continue in his marriage to Tina, but he couldn’t go on any longer and deny the fact that he had these feelings for men." The tab promises more details when the new issue hits grocery store check out lanes later this week. Stay tuuuuned!

COVERSHOT - THE TIMBERLAKE/BIEL WEDDING: JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE is jumping for joy on the oover both People and Hello magazine ...

The New York Post reports the newlyweds were paid $300,000 by People, and also got a few dollars from the UK mag for pretty much just sharing the same photo. But hey, you can't blame a guy --  the wedding cost them 6 mill.

DID JUSTIN BIEBER BUY DRUGS AND GET HIS JUNK ENLARGED WITH STOLEN CREDIT CARD?!: JUSTIN BIEBER is named in a crazy lawsuit brought by a man who claims to be SELENA GOMEZ'S father.

According to TMZ, the unidentified man is claiming Biebs owes him $426.67 in abortion money because Justin, quote, “got my daughter Selena pregnant in my bedroom on my Canadian bear rug.”

He also claims Bieber stole his credit card in order to get a penis enlargement and buy cocaine "to use in drug free school zones." And just to show how serious the lawsuit is, crazy dude added USHER to the mix, claiming Ush sodomized him on the Fourth of July with a firework while playing the KATY PERRY song “Firework.” Craziest. Lawsuit. Ever.

KELLY OSBOURNE SHOWS US HER PICS:  KELLY OSBOURNE Tweeted out this photo of her wearing her PJ's under her dress! Wha? I know! But the 'F-my life' look on the guy in the background's face is the real takeaway here ...


BRITNEY SPEARS EX-MANAGER TAKES THE STAND IN DEFAMATION TRIAL: Britney Spears' so called ex-manager Sam Lutfi took the stand in his defamation lawsuit today yesterday. Lutfi admitted to taking Adderall himself, but denied fueling Brit with the drug, despite allegations to the contrary.

Michael Kovac/Getty Images

In his lawsuit, Sam alleges that Lynne Spears defamed him in a book in which she depicted him as a Svengali-like figure who exploited Britney's vulnerabilities and gave her drugs to control her. However he says he actually saved her from herself, protecting Brit from the paparazzi and others during a critical period in her life.

PHOTO GALLERY - CELEBRITIES TAKE THEIR KIDS TO THE PUMPKIN PATCH: Evidently the Mr. Bones Pumpkin Patch in West Hollywood is THE place for celebrities to take their kids when it's time to go pumpkin shopping. Celebs that have hit up the place in the last few days include CHRISTINA AGUILERA, HALLE BERRY, and HEIDI KLUM. RadarOnline has posted a huge photo gallery of celebrities pumpkin shopping HERE.

BABY POOP - MELISSA JOAN HART DEBUTS SON TUCKER: Melissa Joan Hart is introducing her new son to the world. The 'Melissa & Joey' star posed with four-week-old Tucker McFadden Wilkerson and her two other sons for the celebrity site omg!, as well as for a "first official" family portrait for Us Weekly. (PHOTO), (PHOTO), (PHOTO)

KRISTIN CAVALLARI SHOWS US HER PICS: Former "Hills" star KRISTIN CAVALLARI hit up Twitter to share a photo of 11-week-old son, Camden Jack, watching his daddy, Bears QB Jay Cutler, on Monday Night Football ...