Do You Have F.W.P.? There’s Help For ‘First World Problems’ – A PSA From Your Auntie Titi
I was at the grocery store just a little while ago and had a bout of F.W.P. You see, I had just gotten my nails done and I smudged them while I was looking at bottles of balsamic vinegar….
I know, it’s tragic that my freshly polished nails were marred when I was putting back a really expensive bottle of aged balsamic vinegar on the shelf while reaching for another one. I stood there, frozen in my tracks. How could this have happened? Did God have it out for me? I was going to either have to go back to my nail salon and get them fixed – something that would have required me to get into my fully gassed up, air-conditioned vehicle, while listening to my stereo with the sunroof open – or walk around with smudged polish.
My God, what would people think? My nails wouldn’t be perfect – I could see the finger pointing and snickering behind my back in my mind. I did what I had to do. I paid for my groceries, had them taken out to my car by a nice young man – the store obviously realized that if I had to do that on my own, I would have smudged even more of my polish – and went back to the nail salon.
It was quite a trek – I had to wait for 2 red lights, TWO! And then I had to wait for three minutes for my nail tech to fix the smudge. And then I had to drive home and take my groceries from my car to my house. Why can’t the grocery store have that nice young man follow me home? I’m going to have to speak to them about that.
Exhausted, I sat down to check my email, and I stumbled on this clip that really gets how hard my life is. I’m not sure what the ending means, but I know that I have experienced first-hand the horrors of F.W.P. – First World Problems. Thank goodness someone has seen what hardships I go through.